It's like an episode of Lassie around here

My kids crack me up. They have conversations that just goes right over my head.

B will be all, "Uh, uh."

And H will say, "The ball? Where?"

And B will be all, "Uuuuhhh." And he won't point or anything to give a good indication.

H will reply with, "It's under the changing table? Do you want me to help you?"

And then there are some more, "Uh, uh, uuuuhhh, uh" from B while H rescues the ball and I'm just sitting there going WTF, how did she get that from "uh?"

You know, it's like when you watch Lassie and Lassie is all, "Woof! Woof!" and the kid is like, "Mr. Brown? He's stuck in the river?" And you're just going, "What?"

Yep, that's become my life. One Lassie show after another. And it's cute and all, but dude! I have no freaking clue what he is saying. So then when he comes to me and is "Uh, uh, uh," I'm just like, "Sonny-boy, I speak English. Un poco espanol. Cavman, however, not so much." And it infuriates him, so after a few more tries he'll finally shout something random like "Lizard!" and I'm like, "yeah, I understand that! But if there is a freaking lizard in our house we might have to burn the place down to get rid of it because Mommy isn't very brave."

So it seems my choices are grunts and uhs or random-ass words that might get us all killed.

And it's strange, because he knows words. He just doesn't choose to use them. Like Reneesme from Twilight. Only B isn't equipped with some super power that can still tell me what he wants.

He just has to hope his interpreter (aka H) is around. Or choose sensible words. Otherwise, he's on his own with that lizard!